Burlesque: Embarrassing Confessions Part 3

Our embarrassing moments blog is back. We’ve got fan dance fiascos and costume calamities aplenty. Forgive us as we strip back the glamour, forego the tease and tell it like it is; this is what happens when burlesque goes tits up….

“I was doing a private show one time for a posh birthday do. I’m known for my fan dances so they’d picked that. I’ve done the act hundreds of times, could do it in my sleep. But nothing can prepare you for a slippery stage! Before I knew it, I was flat on my back on the floor, flailing like an upside-down turtle. The only way to save it was to adopt the classic pin-up legs kicking up pose and do a hide and reveal clam manoeuvre until I’d regained my composure enough to stand up again.”

“Early on in my career I decided to do a fan dance for a rock night. I’d picked the perfect song and was dead excited. Everything was fine til I put both fans in one hand to do a bra removal and…. Clunk! Dropped one of the fans right off the front of the stage into the front row of the audience. Someone picked it up and gave it back to me. I could tell she was embarrassed for me but not as much as I was. Cringe!”

“I’d been invited to perform as a special guest at a touring show a few years ago and was performing a classic Isis wings routine. The act was going marvellously until it came to the corset removal and the middle clasp on my busk got stuck. It had got bent and there was simply no chance it was coming off onstage that night. Unfortunately, my skirt was tightly affixed beneath the corset so that wouldn’t be coming off either. I was forced to improvise the entirety of the remainder of my routine, whilst being restricted by the clothing I couldn’t remove. It was dreadfully embarrassing and such an obvious mistake but there was nothing I could do.”

“One of my fave costumes has this cute little bustle, which I make a big deal of removing later on in the act. More than once, things haven’t gone to plan, when I’ve removed another piece of costume and somehow caught the ribbon that ties the bustle and it’s dropped right off, before it’s meant to. Thankfully, it’s such a smooth (if accidental) move, that it generally gets a cheer – everybody loves clandestine clothing removal and several people have commented on how clever a move it is. It’s not; it’s pure clumsiness but I guess I should be glad people think it’s intentional!”

So there you have it. Burlesquers prove once more that it really is about the old adage “Fake it til you make it!” We’ll be back with more embarrassing confessions in August (due to popular demand, we’re making this a regular monthly-ish blog) but in the meantime, check out our previous blogs for more burlesque mishaps and mayhem.

Embarrassing Confessions Part 1

Embarrassing Confessions Part 2